Around this time of year, most people are watching childhood favorites, cult classics, slasher films, and the 382nd sequel to Halloween. This is all perfectly fine, but for me, it just isn’t aesthetic. Personally, I think it’s great fun to fill a silver goblet with Red Dye No. 40 and pretend that it is the forties. Join me for a marathon of true classics, and let me know what else you think deserves to be on the list!
1. The Phantom of the Opera (1925)
Long before Andrew Lloyd Weber inexpicably asked, “What if the ugly guy was handsome?” the Phantom of the Opera was a living corpse old enough to have built the operahouse himself. And long before Hollywood had makeup departments, actor Lon Chaney had to do his own undead transformations. It wasn’t uncommon for silent film actors to be stuck with this work, but Chaney’s ingenuity is renowned. No adaptation is as thrilling as Gaston Leroux’s novel (why does everyone leave out the Persian!), but this early attempt went so far as to wash a few scenes in vibrant color.
2. Frankenstein (1931)
You’re going to hear me say this a lot, the book was better. (The SyFy Channel’s two-part adaptation is actually the truest to Mary Shelley’s novel!) This version is actually based on a play by Peggy Webling. However, Boris Karloff’s monster is so iconic that practically every attempt at Frankenstein since has referenced it somehow. It’s also a bittersweet tale of heartbreak, but not so much that any little ones should have trouble sleeping at night.
3. Dracula (1931)
This is the one for which everyone knows tragic actor Bela Lugosi (you may have heard he’s dead). Renfield really steals the show in the Spanish-language version, which was filmed simultaneously. This adaptation is not as epic as the novel (I love you, Bram Stoker), but in my opinion, none of them are — and the original music for Universal Studios’ Dracula is missing, but Philip Glass composed a new score that you can turn on or off on Universal’s Blu-Ray release.
4. The Mummy (1932)
Boris Karloff returns as a new monster! Let’s be honest, though: this is just Dracula with some names and settings swapped around. Nevertheless, it’s fun to see what the Brendan Fraser movies drew inspiration from, and the climax of this short flick features a twist that none of the newer movies thought to include. (I think. I haven’t seen the Tom Cruise one.)
5. The Invisible Man (1933)
This comedic classic was almost surely an inspriation to Mel Brooks and, out of all the old films I watch in October, it gets the most laughs out of my family. It also surpasses the original — H.G. Wells’ short story is not particularly thrilling. This will really send a shudder down some spines: The Invisible Man film was produced by the NRA, an American gun rights group. But during a season that celebrates the criminally insane, it’s nice to remember that shooting maniacs is a perfectly sane solution.
6. Dracula’s Daughter (1936)
In Dracula, a hedonistic monster hunts humans until they finally bring themselves, and him, salvation in death. In Dracula’s Daughter, the story is brilliantly told in reverse. Our titular heroine thinks herself free now that her father has been immolated, only to find that her vampiric desires still cling to her. A heart-rending tale of addiction and the limits of psychotherapy. This might be my favorite of the Universal horror classics, and it’s hard to get ahold of! It was not included in my Blu-Ray collection, and the last time I saw it for free was on Peacock. Good luck, everybody!
7. The Hound of the Bakservilles (1939)
This Sherlock Holmes film might not technically be horror, but it’s certainly gothic, featuring family curses, murder, intrigue, and a monster. This is the first Sherlock Holmes adaptation to put him back where he belongs in the Victorian era (which, if you ask me, reached the pinnacle of human aesthetics). This one is free on YouTube!
8. The Wolfman (1941)
Remember Lon Chaney playing the Phantom up there? Well now his son, Lon Chaney Jr., is here, and he’s got help in the from of a makeup department! The Wolfman is probably the most thought-provoking of the old classics, focusing not so much on the spectacle of a hairy monster than on the monster that lives in us all and wars against our better nature.
9. Arsenic and Old Lace (1944)
Before there was Young Frankenstein, there was Arsenic and Old Lace! When a recently-married man (Cary Grant) returns home to find that the maiden aunts who raised him are serial killers, he must keep his bride from discovering the bodies, his aunts from killing again, and the police from tearing his family apart. Matters are further complicated by the return of his sadistic stepbrother played by Boris Karloff. Peter Lorre and John Alexander also give unforgettable performances. With one turn of the screw after another, you’ll laugh so much you’ll need a break when it’s all over.
10. The Picture of Dorian Gray (1945)
This flick from Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer is so old that Angela Lansbury is playing an innocent young bombshell. If that doesn’t entice you, it also notably features special effects on the titular cursed portrait so that audiences can marvel at it in Technicolor. It might be hard to get ahold of this one, but the 1915 silent film is free on YouTube. I’ll say it one more time: the novel is probably better than any adaptation. Props to Oscar Wilde.
11. Young Frankenstein (1974)
Mel Brooks’ tongue-in-cheek stab at making a new movie appear old is not without love for the original material. With a fantastic script and a supremely talented cast and crew, Young Frankenstein is almost perfect. (That one scene is just too rapey for my taste. Enjoy this one without the kids.)
12. The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (2005)
While you can always watch the silent German version from 1920, and boy do nerds love that one, why settle for reading title cards between artsy expressionism when you can instead enjoy a movie made with functioning cameras and microphones? Nerds like this one, too — it won three prizes at ScreamFest. Both are free on YouTube!
13. Frankenweenie (2012)
Goth confessions: I think Tim Burton is an overrated hack. We can talk about that some other time, just keep that opinion of mine in mind when I say Frankenweenie made me shed a few tears. Burton has pulled some winners out of his hat and this is one of his little-mentioned but well-deserved triumphs, a love letter to B-movies (and, of course, canine companions). Also wholesome: the inspiring science teacher. So wholesome it’s borderline heretical: married parents who love one another and their son. Hang on, there’s something in my eye again.